My name is xyz, and I graduated from middle school in 2010 in 2015. That was the same year I first masturbated. One day I was in the room and suddenly I started to caress my genitals. After a while, I felt the release of semen.
This feeling is pleasant and soothing, so I thought I didn’t know the devil was crawling into my life. I cursed the day I had to do it first.
My father and I live alone in an apartment in the same room, and my father always goes to work early and is late. My father left work immediately and I started masturbating. Sometimes once a day, sometimes twice, or even up to three times.
I was admitted to college and that didn’t stop. It’s easier for me since I’ve been outside of campus.
Sometimes I masturbate before class, feel dizzy while slept in college during class, and I am masturbating. I started having negative consequences like anxiety, intestinal guise, fatigue and weakness, and I think some of these things are normal, i.e. dating ladies, especially ladies.
At that time I could see a girl who wanted to have sex with her and I couldn’t wait until my spare time to make the contract. I think people see me masturbate through me. I have this kind of wrong confidence as I am a man.
I moved to the school hotel in the third year, but that didn’t stop. I masturbated in the hotel room, even in the open fields of school.
Just trying to skip a lot of details. I have never been to a family or friends where I masturbate. Even during NYSC in 2022, I masturbated through this program.
I tried to stop and could stay for me for a week or three days and I would go back. I masturbate for time, it’s been 15 years since I started masturbating, I don’t have good social skills, I have a weak relationship with people, I have no job, and now it’s even a scandal. The reason people around me say this is because I don’t have a girlfriend, I don’t have friends, and I don’t talk to anyone.
Without a girlfriend is not my worst problem, that is, I missed my purpose. I can’t say this to anyone because I’m ashamed of it, so I’m here to pour my heart and advise anyone who’s tempted. I ruined my life. I should be a role model, but I am the opposite. I used to have high hopes, but now my intelligence level has decreased.
Masturbation is a demon and evil spirit. I just pray that God helps and heals me and restores me. Praise God.
